tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-11-23:/The story of my search for a submissive, lover, friend and museMokoFeed2009-11-23T06:01:01+01:00tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-11-09:/2009/11/09/adore-7340725/LegendaryFire2009-11-09T23:38:57+01:002009-11-09T23:38:57+01:00 <p>To have a beautiful, sexy, sensual, elegant woman dance and strip down to hold ups and killer heels in private just for you is not only extraordinarily erotic, but is also so good for the soul. </p> <p>It was a delightful morning - warm, intimate, passionate, one that was full of pleasure.  Our bodies always meet so perfectly, whatever we do.  It is a heady mix of desire, hunger, precision, control, and of great generosity.  Seldom has time passed so quickly.</p> <p>Her choice of music, burned onto a CD, entertained me right to my front door when I drove home.  She does herself a disservice when she talks of her limited musical knowledge.  Her compliation is an eclectic mix across five decades and many genres.  What makes it special is that I know that some of the tracks are there because they express her feelings - and all were chosen with love.</p> <p>To adore and be adored.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/11/09/adore-7340725/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-11-09:/2009/11/09/just-wanna-make-love-to-you-7339524/SensualJenny2009-11-09T20:36:49+01:002009-11-09T23:49:11+01:00 <p><span> </span></p> <p><span><span><span>We met today for what felt like the first time in ages. My arm is bending more normally now. So I danced and stripped to a tune I had chosen. Etta James ‘I just wanna make love to you’. And we fucked beautifully. It was an emotional day for me, and it still it. I sooo want more of him. I don’t have enough to satisfy my desire for his company, but he is my perfect lover. I am grateful for small blessings but wish I had more.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Traffic meant that he arrived late; and then I had to leave at 1.30pm for 2 meetings. But immediately hit traffic so bad that I missed both of them so may as well have stayed luxuriating in bed.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>I gave him another music compilation CD. Nervously, as he is knowledgeable about music. I don’t need to do this, it is me who wants to be educated and widen my music knowledge. But I hope it gives him pleasure in return for his CDs. A new compilation made with thought and love must be flattering to receive. Even if he does almost always know all the tracks. I am looking forward to his next one to me. I will learn from it, which I am sure he does not from mine – except for learning a little about my tastes.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>I have no idea when I will see him again. I hope it is soon. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Jenny x</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span> </span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/11/09/just-wanna-make-love-to-you-7339524/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-10-27:/2009/10/27/broken-winged-angel-7257114/SensualJenny2009-10-27T23:56:48+01:002009-10-27T23:56:48+01:00 <p><span><span><span>He calls me his broken winged angel. We didn’t make it to Agent Provocateur. I fell badly and broke my elbow. It needed an operation and five screws to fix it. It still doesn’t straighten or bend fully. It is so sweet that he still thinks I am elegant. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>But it led to a period of tension. Of misunderstanding. I felt fragile, wanted nurturing. He perhaps felt unable to satisfy that need. Yet did not realise how powerful gentle words can be even from a distance, or how much effect his messages have in reassuring me.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>We cleared the air today via msn. Thank goodness for modern communication.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>I miss closeness with him so much when I do not have it.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Jenny x</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/10/27/broken-winged-angel-7257114/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-10-27:/2009/10/27/when-she-walks-7256803/LegendaryFire2009-10-27T23:25:41+01:002009-10-27T23:25:41+01:00 <p>I must have noticed it before, but somehow it was just part of her overall attraction. </p> <p>When she walks she is so graceful.  There is something delicate, lithe, balanced, extraordinarily feminine about her.  She could be a dancer, a gymnast, a model, a teenage girl.</p> <p>Her movements are poetry.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/10/27/when-she-walks-7256803/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-10-25:/2009/10/25/onion-7243683/LegendaryFire2009-10-25T23:46:58+01:002009-10-25T23:46:58+01:00 <p>Of course, it should be simple.  But it seldom is.  Humans are not simple creatures - our emotions, our motives, our hopes and our fears are often complex.</p> <p>What starts off as straightforward soon becomes much less so. </p> <p>It is like unpeeling an onion, and yet in reverse, and it still causes the eyes to burn with tears.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/10/25/onion-7243683/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-10-04:/2009/10/04/lunch-and-sexy-shopping-7094745/LegendaryFire2009-10-04T10:11:57+02:002009-10-04T10:11:57+02:00 <p>We met on Friday in a pub on a canal in a small village on the Buckinghamshire/Bedfordshire border and ordered food that was good, but that neither of us finished.  I was, and still am unwell, with this undefined illness that seems to have had me in its grip for weeks.  But seeing jenny cheered me up significantly - and we snogged in my car in the car park near the water - hoping my hands wandering over her body would not be noticed by a nearby fisherman. </p> <p>She looked beautiful and sexy, and her body felt so good beneath my fingers.</p> <p>She leaves the country for a weeks holiday tomorrow.  I shall miss her.  But as she writes, we have shopping and sex to look forward to.  I do hate shopping, but there are some things that are worth shopping for. And it will be fun looking at the clothes and dressing my submissive angel in items of my choice.</p> <p>A shared sexy activity in the public eye.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/10/04/lunch-and-sexy-shopping-7094745/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-10-03:/2009/10/03/agent-provacateur-7092796/SensualJenny2009-10-03T20:56:47+02:002009-10-03T20:58:42+02:00 <p><span><span><span>He hates shopping but we are planning a shopping trip next meeting in just under two weeks. Followed swiftly home to my bedroom. I live not far from an Agent Provocateur store. We are meeting there. He will direct proceedings (including no doubt the assistant) and choose garments/sizes and oversee trying on. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>I am excitedly looking forward to it. If he is still ill we (the shop assistant and I, whoever she will be) will let him sit on a stool outside my changing room. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Jenny x </span></span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/10/03/agent-provacateur-7092796/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-26:/2009/09/26/a-perfect-day-part-three-7044902/LegendaryFire2009-09-26T18:14:52+02:002009-09-26T18:19:11+02:00 <p>This sums up the day.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/26/a-perfect-day-part-three-7044902/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-26:/2009/09/26/a-perfect-day-part-two-7042929/LegendaryFire2009-09-26T11:04:16+02:002009-09-26T11:10:13+02:00 <p>I have not been well this past week.  I have no energy, a sore throat, feel constantly dizzy, and at times am listless and without my usual drive.</p> <p>And yet, as Jenny has written, we had a perfect day - one that was almost 'vanilla', which is so very unusual for me.  Apart from spanking her briefly and a spell of her being blindfolded while I undressed her and my hands roamed over her body, our love-making was entirely without a D/s element. Even the new toy was not BDSM related.</p> <p>I let her ride me, I let her fuck me with her legs astride me.  She was wearing her thigh high, high heeled boots and dark hold ups and she looked stunning.  My climax was incredible.</p> <p>It was a lovely day. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/26/a-perfect-day-part-two-7042929/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-25:/2009/09/25/sex-love-7041218/SensualJenny2009-09-25T23:02:10+02:002009-09-25T23:02:58+02:00 <p><span><span><span>We had the most perfect day today. He arrived at 9am for 6 and a half hours of intimacy and affection. We stayed in my apartment and went out for a romantic meal at lunch time but there the similarity with previous occasions ended. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>He was less energetic than usual. Viral and below par. But it made him so loving and for me, so wanting of emotional connection, it was the most special of our days together. He didn’t have the energy to tie me up and it was wonderful for a change to be able to have whole body skin to skin contact and luxuriate in the sensation of being close to him, touching him and exploring his body. We had a new sex toy we played with which was fun, so not just vanilla. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Fond memories. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Jenny x </span></span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/25/sex-love-7041218/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-21:/2009/09/21/the-dream-and-the-reality-part-two-7008132/LegendaryFire2009-09-21T09:15:24+02:002009-09-21T09:15:24+02:00 <p>There is a sense of sad inevitability about her post.  She still adores me, and does not wish to walk away - and yet the compromise she is having to make is considerable.  It is heavy in almost her every line.  Along with a deep sadness, and a longing for the things I cannot give her. </p> <p>At times I feel like I am a drug that she is taking - she knows that I am bad for her, and yet the pleasure of taking me outweighs (for the time being) the damage I do.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/21/the-dream-and-the-reality-part-two-7008132/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-20:/2009/09/20/the-dream-and-the-reality-7006127/SensualJenny2009-09-20T21:55:45+02:002009-09-20T22:32:56+02:00 <p><span><span><span>Being an independent woman I thought perhaps it would be enough to have intermittent injections of passion and intimacy, with time and freedom to allow myself to get on with my own life. I can and do survive without a man, without a partner. But of course I would rather not. And just surviving is not something that I aspire to. I would rather share more, give more, receive more and achieve that delicate balance of interdependence. Not living independently of each other and not dependant either. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Perhaps this relationship will be enough for sometime to come, but I so miss more frequent intimacy. And I don’t mean sex. But affection. Physical contact. And someone who gets to know the detail of ones daily life. Someone whom you know and knows you so well, better than any other. Someone who can give not just intimacy but care and love. I don’t need it, but it would be so nice to have.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>But is that a dream? And perhaps what I have is as good a compromise as one can expect. It certainly has many pluses and there is still much pleasure. And I still adore him and do not wish to walk away.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Jenny x</span> </span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/20/the-dream-and-the-reality-7006127/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-17:/2009/09/17/wednesday-morning-a-bright-star-6981783/LegendaryFire2009-09-17T08:50:52+02:002009-09-17T08:52:48+02:00 <p>We had just under four and a half hours together. It began, after our hungry kisses and such relieved and happy hugs of welcome, with a cup of tea on her leather sofa.  It ended with a delicious fish salad she had prepared in advance.</p> <p>In between we made love in the way that we do, part enacting a fantasy that I will not relate, but that we both enjoyed enormously.  At one point she was standing in impossibly high heels wearing nothing but a leather cuff on each wrist and ankle and a leather collar around her throat, her arms raised above her head. She looked so beautiful and so sexy that I just admired her, adoring her elegant curves, her perfect breasts, gorgeous legs, delectable bum, and sexy back.  Her hair, growing longer now, is so lovely.</p> <p>We spent most of our time in her living room, on the carpet and using a large execise ball, but we spent an intimate half an hour in bed beneath the sheets. It is heaven when we are both sated and are locked together, skin to skin. She shed some tears, but I wasn't the cause of all of them.  It is good knowing that she confides in me, although I so hate to see her sad. </p> <p>She has now gone away for a short holiday.  Our communication will be limited to text until Sunday evening. </p> <p>These brief moments of meeting are like impossibly bright stars in a dull, flat, black sky.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/17/wednesday-morning-a-bright-star-6981783/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-14:/2009/09/14/two-sleeps-6964385/LegendaryFire2009-09-14T23:05:07+02:002009-09-14T23:05:07+02:00 <p>... until we see each other again.</p> <p>It feels like it has been forever.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/14/two-sleeps-6964385/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-11:/2009/09/11/non-consensual-sex-part-two-6941126/LegendaryFire2009-09-11T10:00:54+02:002009-09-11T10:00:54+02:00 <p>Rape - real rape - and sexual violence are such appalling crimes.  Those that commit them are inadequate, pathetic, cruel, selfish, brutal.  The thought of forcing oneself upon another person and violating them is utterly distasteful.  And I am sure that being raped must be horrific, degrading, a nightmare.</p> <p>But why, for both jenny and I, this fantasy? (and I'm sure, not just for us, but for many men and women - as jenny says, it is not an uncommon fantasy - for either sex).  I can't answer that.  Except that as a fantasy played out, as a game to be enjoyed with a partner one trusts and adores and by whom one is incredibly sexually excited, then it is an extraordinarily exciting sexual and sensual experience.</p> <p>To wrestle jenny from the sofa, turn her around and pinion her arms behind her back with one arm while I rip at her top with the other was both fun and erotic. She did fight to stay dressed, but I tore her clothing from her.  I enjoyed grabbing her bra and ripping it in half to expose her breasts (and what beautifully shaped, pert breasts they are).  Her nipples were hard berries.  I squeezed them firmly beneath my fingers making her gasp.</p> <p>Her skirt, once I had destroyed the zip, was not so difficult to remove, by which time I had her knickers off anyway.  I forced her thighs apart with my knees.  She was soaking wet.  Tying her was not as difficult as I expected.  She was tired, and a little sweet pain made her co operate.</p> <p>At this point we were both breathing hard, were thoroughly aroused, and gloriously happy that our relationship allows us to express our darkest fantasies, and to enact them, to live them.  How many people truly get the chance to do just that.</p> <p>It is very special.</p> <p>Oh, and jenny...  the blindfold was for variety not to make it easier for me to strip you. You are right - a little punishment would not go amiss</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/11/non-consensual-sex-part-two-6941126/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-10:/2009/09/10/non-consensual-sex-6939289/SensualJenny2009-09-10T23:13:14+02:002009-09-10T23:13:14+02:00 <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>Let me first make it clear, I would absolutely not want non consensual sex. Rape and sexual assault are crimes and I am not in any way trying to justify them. Although it may seem hard to understand why, it is well documented as a common sexual fantasy of women. It is not a fantasy I literally wanted to make real of course. However, what I did want to make reality is some rough sex, some wrestling, some consensual, non consensual sex. </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>So last time I saw LegendaryFire we played a game. I wore some clothes that were going to go to charity or were being thrown out, so I did not mind them being damaged. The aim of the game was for me to remain on the sofa in the living room fully clothed. The aim for LegendaryFire was to get me into the bedroom and get me naked and tied to the bed. There was a twist….as this was the second time we played this. I was to be blindfold. The blindfold was taped on thoroughly with bondage tape so it was firm and would<span>  </span>not come off even with significant man handling. Maybe this was driven by LegendaryFire wanting to make it easier for himself this time……. I will get a punishment for that!</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>It was fun, intimate, disorientating, breathtaking, exhausting and very erotic.  I honestly did ALL I could to stop him, except no biting. Yet he ripped off my top tearing it at the neck, tore the zip of my skirt and removed it despite huge efforts to prevent him, tore my knickers and snapped the bra in the middle front between the two cups. And successfully tied me to the bed to have his wicked way.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>It was fantastic!<br></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>I would recommend it.<br> <br>Jenny x<br></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/10/non-consensual-sex-6939289/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-08:/2009/09/08/price-6924462/LegendaryFire2009-09-08T18:50:01+02:002009-09-08T18:51:05+02:00 <p>At the moment it is hard for jenny and I to meet frequently or to establish a routine without raising suspicions at home.  I have to carefully judge the likely perceived credibilty of my excuses days in advance, unable to know what fragments my wife's intuition is picking up, or will pick up closer to the event. Each story requires a lightness of touch that is so difficult to maintain.  The lies feel hollow and easy to read.  At times there is an extreme tension inside me.</p> <p>But if it is hard for me, then it must be far more painful for jenny.</p> <p>All gifts seem to come at a price.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/08/price-6924462/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-05:/2009/09/05/our-day-6895511/SensualJenny2009-09-05T08:34:39+02:002009-09-05T08:42:08+02:00 <p><span><span><span><br>I was also so tired after He left. I went to bed at 10pm and slept soundly til 8. I have just woken.  </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>It was a delicious day. It led me to discover another advantage of married men. I would not be able to keep this up so with daily contact things would change rapidly! And I am 12 years younger than He.  I think we are both probably in need of a weeks rest…. <br></span></span></span><span><span><span><br>Jenny x<br></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> </p> <p class="MsoNormal"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/05/our-day-6895511/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-04:/2009/09/04/our-day-6893565/LegendaryFire2009-09-04T22:24:44+02:002009-09-04T22:24:44+02:00 <p>I am so tired.. Such a good tired.  A warm, safe, satisfied, wonderful tired that is making my eyelids heavy and taking the strength from my body.</p> <p>jenny I were together for the day today. It was all we expected it to be.  Special.  Perfect.</p> <p>I could write about all the things we did, the words we said, the joy we had.  The wonder of it all. </p> <p>But right now, in this state of delightful exhaustion, I could never even come close to doing our day justice.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/04/our-day-6893565/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-02:/2009/09/02/into-my-arms-6874054/LegendaryFire2009-09-02T09:37:04+02:002009-09-02T16:46:12+02:00 <p>A song for jenny</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/02/into-my-arms-6874054/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-09-01:/2009/09/01/six-hours-of-heaven-6868314/LegendaryFire2009-09-01T16:19:44+02:002009-09-01T16:19:44+02:00 <p>We will have around six hours together on Friday.  Some of that time will be spent sitting entwined in each others arms in a local restaurant, enjoying each other's company in public.</p> <p>The rest of the time will be in her apartment and is down to me.  I decide what we will do, when we will do it, how it will be done.  I decide what jenny will wear, or what she will not wear.  I decide whether I shall give her pleasure or pain.   her body is completely mine, to do with as I will.  she is my slave to instruct, to discipline, to command.  she is my plaything, my creature, my submissive, my dancer.   It is in the nature of her Gift to me that sexually I have complete control.  I can do whatever I want.  She will do whatever I tell her.</p> <p>And yet it is not a one sided arrangement by any means.  Apart from the fact that she is deeply aroused by the reality of my control and her submission, she also knows that I understand her body very well, and have a desire to know it perfectly.  she knows that I adore bringing her to climax. </p> <p>Often. </p> <p>she is aware that she has revealed to me many of her most hidden needs and fantasies.. she knows that she is, over time, having them all fulfilled.  she trusts me completely with her body.  She knows that I will never really hurt her, never humiliate her. <br>Which means that she can enjoy my focussed and total attention on her, and on what she feels.</p> <p>Which is what turns me on.  My control, her submission, the knowledge that I can make her body sing. I can make her sigh, ache, moan, writhe, and gasp.  It is as much an intellectual pleasure as a corporeal one.  Which is why my own orgasm can be witheld until very end, until she is almost spent.</p> <p>After which we curl up in each others arms, our bodies locked together, our faces close, and try to halt the steady ticking away of time.</p> <p>We have six hours together on Friday, at least four hours of which will be spent 'making love'.  It will fly by so fast. </p> <p>It will be heaven.</p> <p> </p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/09/01/six-hours-of-heaven-6868314/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-31:/2009/08/31/the-various-comments-on-my-last-post-about-jealousy-have-6863798/SensualJenny2009-08-31T22:29:27+02:002009-09-01T17:02:51+02:00 <p><span><span><span>The various comments on my last post about jealousy have made me think about a therapeutic strategy to cope. This relationship will never be satisfactory as it is. I will never be totally fulfilled and cannot see that I will ever not be resentful that He is not mine. However, I do not wish to walk away as there is pleasure and intimacy, excitement and the fulfilment of fantasies. And I just adore Him. More on the fantasies perhaps another time. Perhaps.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>So I want to make a list of all the good things about loving a married man. This is not to say I am coming to terms with it, finding it less difficult, accepting it or staying with it.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>However, it is a way to try and make it easier.</span></span></span></p> <ul> <li><span><span><span>Time unaffected by the stresses of everyday chores. </span></span></span></li> <li><span><span><span>Time for each other with no distractions; just for those moments anyway. Until he has to rush away not to be late for wifey. </span></span></span></li> <li><span><span><span>The repeated and enduring excitement of anticipation. </span></span></span></li> <li><span><span><span>Passion, passion and more undying passion. </span></span></span></li> <li><span><span><span>An ability to share the embarrassment of some sexual fantasies that perhaps one might not with someone ones sees daily. Msn is great for this. No eye contact. Much easier to disclose what dirty things one wants to do. </span></span></span></li> </ul> <p><span><span><span>Perhaps you can help with more?</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>Jenny x</span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/31/the-various-comments-on-my-last-post-about-jealousy-have-6863798/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-30:/2009/08/30/being-away-6856651/LegendaryFire2009-08-30T21:51:51+02:002009-08-30T21:51:51+02:00 <p>I have just returned from holiday.  Home to the usual mini disasters, problems and frustrations.</p> <p>And home to three beautiful posts from Jenny, my utterly adorable submissive lover. </p> <p>I know that it is hard for her.  It doesn't matter that I have not had a sexual relationship with my wife for years, it doesn't matter that I miss Jenny so much - an ache that does not stop, it doesn't matter that I long to be with my lovely sub. it doesn't matter that I am also in pain without our regular contact.</p> <p>None of that matters because she is in such an agonising position and it hurts me that she is there, and that she is suffering</p> <p>I do all I can to make her happy, but it will never be quite enough.  Yet she knows that I care for her - more deeply perhaps than any unencumbered lover.</p> <p>This is beautiful.  This is agony.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/30/being-away-6856651/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-30:/2009/08/30/erotic-dancing-part-two-6856585/LegendaryFire2009-08-30T21:40:22+02:002009-08-30T21:40:22+02:00 <p>If a woman who cares for you has not danced erotically for you - just for you - or - if you are a woman, you have not danced for your lover or husband, then I believe you have missed out on something very special.</p> <p>Jenny dancing....</p> <p>Oh, Jenny can certainly dance.  she was made for it.  she has already danced for me three times before.  Each time it was sensual, sexy, erotic, arousing, unbelievably beautiful.  she has the perfect body for it.  Wonderful pert breasts, a beautiful flat tummy, perfect curving hips and a delightful bum.  And such elegant legs.  It is a body to die for, and she knows how to move it magnificently.  She also looks at me as she dances - deep into my eyes.</p> <p>Yes, I adore her dancing completely naked except for boots or heels, but that gives the impression that I ONLY adore her dancing naked, which isn't true.  I love what she wears for me, the way she removes it in such a delicious way.  I love striptease.  Her choice of clothing is so good and, I know I have said it before, she is one of those very rare women who look incredible whether fully dressed, semi clothed, or completely naked.</p> <p>It is just that the latter looks so vulnerable and submissive when she dances that I ache for every inch of her.</p> <p>When she dances for me on Friday it will be heaven.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/30/erotic-dancing-part-two-6856585/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-29:/2009/08/29/trying-to-overcome-frustration-and-jealousy-6849633/SensualJenny2009-08-29T19:23:20+02:002009-08-29T22:10:25+02:00 <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>He has been away a week. On holiday with his wife and daughter. He has found no internet café’s. There is a comparative silence. Texts and a two minute phone call. The contrast to regular msn, emails and phone calls, memories of sexual meetings or intimate lunches is stark. It is hard. Why is it hard? It is hard because it is impossible not to be resentful. It is impossible not to feel neglected. It is impossible to not want more. </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>So what do I do? I do not wish to walk away. Why? Because I know there is so much pleasure to still explore. Because I adore him like I have never adored anyone. Because I know that compatible romantic Dominants are rare. And we are exceedingly compatible. But I am trying to not let that jealousy destroy it. I know I need to learn to enjoy the process more and let go of the outcome.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>  </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>Constructive suggestions welcome. </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>Jenny x </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/29/trying-to-overcome-frustration-and-jealousy-6849633/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-26:/2009/08/26/the-6829669/SensualJenny2009-08-26T22:17:41+02:002009-08-28T13:44:19+02:00 <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><br>The beautiful thing about this Dom/sub relationship is the intimacy, understanding and closeness that the exchange of power and affection generates. Allowing someone to restrain one, to strike one in a consensual context generates a new level of trust and respect.</span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span>I want to do what is required to please him as it pleases me. But he also needs to give me pleasure...as he knows I am a free spirit and I can withdraw that gift of submission and dedication. I have needs of my own beyond fulfilling his. </span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span><span><span><span>There are so many types of submissives and Dominants. Ours is very much confined to the bedroom. But for sexual fulfilment it is not an option. It is such a strong urge I feel within myself and it is rewarding to give. But only if that gift is appreciated and the pleasure it comes with is reciprocated. Which it is. </span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span><span><span><span>I feel more complete with him in my life. But at the same time loving LegendaryFire feels as if it might be the worst pain already that I have experienced, and at other times it is wonderful…the best and most delicious experience ever. I know that we have a rare connection. Not only because of the unique and delicious nature of the Dom/sub experience but also physically and intellectually we are attracted to each other. </span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span><span><span><span>It feels like I have smelt the most beautiful  nectar and yet I cannot reach it.</span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span><span><span><span>Jenny x </span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p><span><span><span><span><span><span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/26/the-6829669/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-23:/2009/08/23/erotic-dancing-6799174/SensualJenny2009-08-23T11:20:17+02:002009-08-23T11:20:17+02:00 <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><span>I love moving erotically to music. It makes me wet just doing it. It is perfect foreplay. Lap dancing, burlesque, pole dancing…. I would have loved to have mastered them. <span> </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span>I love lingerie too and I prefer to dance in lingerie however minimal or to strip to something minimal. Less is more. I think too much flesh is less attractive. Legendary Fire disagrees….but that’s a male thing. The suggestion and the anticipation of nudity is the fun part. I love seamed stockings/holdups, fishnets and lace top stockings. I love basque lingerie and suspender belts. I love my high heeled black patent sandles with wedges – the tricky bit is being stable on ones feet. A stumbling dancer is not sexy.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><span>I have been given a track to dance to for our next meeting. I am thinking about the moves. What to do…..<br><strong></strong></span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><br>Jenny x </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span> </span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/23/erotic-dancing-6799174/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-22:/2009/08/22/lunch-part-two-6792277/LegendaryFire2009-08-22T08:49:12+02:002009-08-22T08:49:12+02:00 <p>Jenny was there before me, sitting in the small alcove in the lovely country pub of which we are now fond.  Every time I see her she looks more beautiful.  She is growing her hair for me, and it makes her even more sexy and, when I muzz it up, delightfully decadent.  Her body felt like heaven.</p> <p>It feels so right when we hold each other. And electric.</p> <p>We struggled to concentrate on the menu as we kissed 'like we invented it' (apologies to Elbow) and couldn't keep our hands off each other.  We were almost obscured from view of other customers, but perhaps not quite from the serving staff.  We didn't care.  She was wearing a wrap around dress that became easily unwrapped from her elegant legs.</p> <p>We didn't eat all that we had ordered and we spent a delicious half an hour or so in my car.  She has the pertest breasts and the most delectable nipples that I so love to caress, roll between my fingers and squeeze so hard.  Which Jenny loves, her beautiful eyes go wide with pleasure and pain.</p> <p>Parting was difficult. Physically because she was soaking wet between her thighs and my cock was tumescent.  And emotionally - I am going away a week, and it will be a fortnight until we meet again. The time will pass, but slowly.</p> <p>Later, on her web cam, I watched her naked on her bed, her body absolutely perfect.  I have her climax on my mobile phone.  A reminder of the times when we are physically together - I adore making her come.  Especially when she is tied, her legs spread wide apart.</p> <p>I will be away later today until late next Sunday - and even if I find an internet cafe and am alone, my time will be dedicated to writing to Jenny.  It is my wish that she posts a few times while I am away.</p> <p>Yesterday was extraordinary.  As it always is.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/22/lunch-part-two-6792277/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-21:/2009/08/21/lunch-6778462/SensualJenny2009-08-21T19:19:39+02:002009-08-22T08:26:05+02:00 <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><span><br>Same lovely country pub; same couches in a discreet alcove. A tactile, intimate affair. It should have been a lazy, long lunch but as usual time passed all too quickly, even though we had three hours. No time for desert or coffee - priority  quite rightly given to some half dressed heavy petting in the carpark. The frustration of leaving a rock hard cock inadequately used and unattended to, was partly relieved by sex on msn once in our respective homes, and my orgasm on his voicemail for keepsake.</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><span><span> </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><span><span>Wonderfully adolescent. </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span><span><span><span><br>Jenny x </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/21/lunch-6778462/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>tag:searchfortheone.blog.co.uk,2009-08-21:/2009/08/21/unexpected-6772066/LegendaryFire2009-08-21T10:07:01+02:002009-08-21T10:07:01+02:00 <p>I am seeing Jenny today.  It is unexpected.  A mixture of circumstances had meant that we were going to face spending an impossible month apart.  A couple of days ago a change in my holiday plans made a meeting possible.</p> <p>It will be so, so, so good to see her.  I can almost feel her in my arms now.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://SearchForTheOne.blog.co.uk/2009/08/21/unexpected-6772066/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>